Here at our house, we are the reluctant caretakers of a gecko. His name is Spike.
A friend discovered this poor gecko when she almost stepped on him (it?) in her garage. He clearly either broke free or was let go, because no geckos live round these parts on their own. So, she put him in a 5-gallon bucket and asked Luke if he'd like a new pet. She had an old fish tank and everything! Luke thought this gecko would surely not live long after such a harrowing journey, so he said sure, he'd take it. He was thinking that after the gecko departed, he'd be able to talk me into some other kind of icky lizard-y, reptile thing he really wants, since we would have already invested in a lovely reptile-y, lizard-friendly environment. But Spike lives on!
Despite our neglect and complete lack of knowledge regarding his care, he has been with us for several months now. Every so often I remember he's here (he lives in the boys' room) and think, "Gee, maybe we should get some crickets," and several days later I get around to buying those crickets. He's got to be starving to death, but I guess these desert creatures can live on very little.
Admittedly, I know next to nothing about geckos, but I've observed that when it's been a while since he's been fed, Spike has trouble catching those first couple of crickets. Is he going blind? I don't know, maybe. But it seems like once he's had a few, he's better at catching them. I have a theory; I think he needs the strength from the first bit of food to be able to catch more food. Or maybe he's out of the habit? Needs to relearn how to use those skills?
I can be a bit like Spike. When digging into the Bible is neglected, it's that much harder for me to establish the habit of doing it. When I haven't been writing regularly, it is so hard to get into the groove. I have to look at the world differently, notice God's activity all around me, think of how to share it. And, once I do get going, I can keep it going, just like Spike. I'd rather live a more 3 meals-a-day, regular diet of Scripture and allowing-God-to-use-me-everyday kind of life. This letting myself get to a point of near starvation, then struggling to survive is just not ideal. But my selfishness and laziness pull me away from what is best. Ugh.
And so, taking the step of obedience to day, and looking to take it again tomorrow and the next day....